Each January and February, hundreds of future statistics and biostatistics PhD students are pawns in what can be a nasty game of application roulette, which roughly consists of the following steps

1) Apply to a dozen schools, and shell out close to $1000 to do so. You don’t get this money back.

2) Wait. Mostly do this.

3) Interview at a recruitment event, which consists of several mini interviews with faculty, most of whom you’ve never heard of and who talk you about research you’ve mostly never heard of. Meanwhile, they ask you about your research plans that you’re mostly making up. No matter what the school or the circumstance, these days and meetings will undoubtedly be awkward.

4) Wait. Continue to do this:

5) Receive some offer. This first offer is almost never the one you want it to be.

6) Wait some more, while fielding phone calls from…